Jeremy graduated from high school with a GPA of 3.75 on June 18, 2010.
He auditioned for, and was chosen to give a commencement speech.
Jeremy Sicile-Kira’s Commencement Speech
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Posted In: Adolescents and Teenagers with Autism, Adults on the Autism Spectrum, Articles, Autism Life Skills, Chantal in the Press, Communication, Educators, Grandparents, Jeremy Sicile-Kira, Parents of Children with Autism, People with Asperger's Syndrome, Siblings of a Child with Autism, Transitions
Tags: adolescents, Autism, commencement speech, high school graduattion, Jeremy Sicile-Kira | 3 Comments »
“THE STATE OF THINGS” North Carolina Public Radio station WUNC
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Click here for a link to the radio show
The program is “The State of Things” on North Carolina Public Radio station WUNC. Longtime NPR correspondent Frank Stasio hosts the program, which this time focused on autism.
The way Franc Stasio introduced me is a description I think describes what all autism moms and dads tend to be – strategists:
“… Jeremy is almost 22 now and he is thriving thanks to an army of experts whose chief strategist and leader of the troops is his mother.” Frank Stasio, host of radio show ‘The State of Things” on WUNC, North Carolina Public Radio, April 2010.
I was on a panel that will include Autism Society of North Carolina spokesperson David Laxton; and a representative of the North Carolina TEACCH program, and Daniel Coulter. TEACCH stands for “Treatment and Education of Autistic and related Communication Handicapped Children” and is associated with the North Carolina School of Medicine.
Posted In: Adolescents and Teenagers with Autism, Adults on the Autism Spectrum, Autism Life Skills, Chantal in the Press, Communication, Educators, Employment, Grandparents, Parents of Children with Autism, People with Asperger's Syndrome, Siblings of a Child with Autism, Transitions
Tags: 41 Things To Know About Autism, : asperger's syndrome, adults, Autism, California Fires, childre, education, life skills, teens, vaccines | No Comments »
What Can Be Done to Help With Sensory Processing Challenges?
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In my last Psychology Today post I discussed sensory processing disorder, and received comments and questions from readers. I had mentioned an article in The Boston Globe that mentioned that a group of professionals and parents was lobbying to get sensory processing disorder included in the next Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Reader Dr. Joshua Feder wrote in to give us the link where people can provide input: “Remember, the public commenting on the upcoming DSM-V is still in process and the addition of SPDs is in flux, so if you think it is important you can make your voice heard. Go to http://www.spdfoundation.net/dsmv.html to learn more!”
Sensory processing challenges is a hot topic at autism conferences and this provides me the opportunity of asking adults on the autism spectrum what we could do to make the sensory aspects of life easier for them, as well as children who may be unable to discuss what they are sensing. I have written up the answers in my book, 41 Things To Know About Autism, and I am mentioning some of them here. Read More »
Posted In: Adolescents and Teenagers with Autism, Adults on the Autism Spectrum, Autism Life Skills, Parents of Children with Autism, People with Asperger's Syndrome, PsychologyToday.com, Transitions
Tags: 41 Things To Know About Autism, asperger's, Autism, Autism Life Skills, brian king, donna williams, propioception, sensory processing disorder, Temple Grandin, the boston globe, touch, vestibular system | 1 Comment »
What happens in Vegas……
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When my son Jeremy was approaching his 21st birthday, one of his support staff, Troy, said that it was time for an all guy trip with his buddies to Las Vegas. Plans were made, and the trip took place at the end of February. The guys–only trip was a success. I don’t know the details – “What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas” as Jeremy spelled out to his math teacher at school who inquired what he did on his trip. I have Jeremy’s permission to post the following picture and what he told me about the trip which is short but sweet: “I had way too much fun.” Obviously, all the guys who went did – there’s talk of making this a bi-annual trip.
Posted In: Adults on the Autism Spectrum, Autism Life Skills, Transitions
Tags: Autism, Las Vegas | 2 Comments »
Modern Love
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My son is pining for a girlfriend. He’s on Facebook.
Relationship Status: Single
Interested In: Women
Looking For: Friendship, Dating, A Relationship, Networking.
Political Views: Go Obama!
About Me: I like to listen to music and walk on the beach. I can type with one finger. I have autism.
Jeremy is quite a catch – he’s buff from working out at the gym, has an endearing personality, and he starred in an award-winning episode of the MTV ‘True Life’ series. Never mind that he is autistic, and needs help with everyday living skills, and probably always will. (In my opinion, he should be looking for a traditional wife who will take care of him, instead of a girlfriend, but I digress).
One night recently I woke up at 3:00 am to find that all the houselights had been turned on. Usually a sound sleeper, Jeremy had been making the rounds. I heard him downstairs and decided to investigate. He was looking through my husband’s collection of architecture books. He found the one he was looking for, Las Vegas: The Fabulous 50’s, and flipped it open to the section on strip clubs and showgirls. “Why are you up, Jeremy, what’s going on?” I asked. “I’m thinking about girls,” he replied.
I am an adult and I think I may have Asperger’s Syndrome (AS). How and why should I get diagnosed if in fact I do have AS?
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This article originally appeared in The Autism Advocate blog at PschologyToday.com
Usually I write mostly about children or adolescents on the autism spectrum. However, I’ve been getting quite a number of emails lately from adults wondering if they have Asperger’s Syndrome or not, so I decided to share some information from my book to be published March 25, 41 Things to Know About Autism. Asperger Syndrome (AS) is a high functioning form of autism that has only been an official diagnosis since 1994. Adults with AS who seek help with challenges they face are sometimes misdiagnosed with depression, bipolar disorder, or other mental illnesses. It is important that adults questioning whether or not they have AS, seek the services of a professional experienced in assessing AS in adults (see resources below).
If you are an adult with characteristics resembling AS, why does it matter if you get a diagnosis or not? If you are functioning well and have a job, and are happy with the life you have, then there is no reason to get a diagnosis. On the other hand, if you are struggling in important areas in your life, a diagnosis can provide a framework for understanding and learning about behavioral and emotional challenges that have seemed unexplainable until now. Although challenges in sensory integration (the ability to organize sensory information for use by the brain) are not considered diagnostic criteria, I have yet to meet a person with Asperger’s who does not have a sensory challenge of one kind or the other.
Some areas of difficulty where Asperger’s Syndrome could possibly be a factor:
- Do you have a tough time making and/or keeping friends, and don’t understand why? Or perhaps your friends are only interested in you when you’re engaged in an activity or interest that you share, but you have not built a personal relationship.
- Are parties not your thing because you feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed? Social events are a great way to meet people and they can be essential for business, dating, and even marriage. But if you are uncomfortable because you are unsure of what to wear, how to start conversations, you have a hard time reading body language, then these supposedly fun events can be torturous.
- Do you avoid social events because you can’t hear the person next to you over the hum of the crowd, you don’t like the touch of shaking people’s hands or having people pat you on the back? Do you a problem focusing on what people are saying while looking at them?
- Have you ever met someone special that you wanted to get to know better, but didn’t have a clue as to how to go about asking him /her out on a date?
- Has someone you are very fond of pointed out certain behaviors that drive them crazy and suggested that you might have Asperger’s Syndrome. Maybe there is something to their suggestion.
- Do you have a passionate interest in a certain subject or topic? Perhaps you’ve been called obsessive but you think you’re just very interested in one incredibly fascinating subject matter. This passionate topic could help you in other areas of your life, if only you knew how to use it.
- If you are a college student , do you have trouble keeping up with coursework and finishing a degree? Perhaps you could use some help in getting and staying organized and planning your time.
- Do you have trouble in getting and keeping a job that reflects your abilities even though your credentials look great on paper? It could be that you are very talented but don’t have a clue as to how to do the sell your self during an interview. Maybe the office politics are just something you don’t get, so you are routinely passed up when it comes to promotions.
Why you should get a diagnosis, if indeed you do have Asperger’s Syndrome:
- You can begin the process of learning to live more adaptively with an Asperger’s brain.
- Getting a diagnosis may help you find the strategies you need to be more successful in the areas where you are facing challenges
- It may also help others in your life understand why you are the way you are, and respond to you differently.
- There is a whole community of people who get who you are, how you think, how you feel, and that you can share experiences with.
- There are autism and AS support groups out there (on-line as well as in person) who can help you in many ways so you don’t have to feel isolated and figure everything out for yourself .
- You may be eligible for service services in areas of need thanks to having a diagnosis – perhaps help with finding a job or a place to live.
How to find out if you have Asperger’s Syndrome or not:
- Typically you need to see either a clinical social worker, a licensed professional counselor, a psychologist, a psychiatrist or neuropsychiatrist. It is important to see a professional who specializes in autism spectrum disorders or Asperger’s Syndrome, who is familiar with Aperger’s Syndrome in adults.
- One way to find the right person in your geographical location is to contact The Global and Regional Asperger Syndrome Partnership (GRASP), http://www.grasp.org/and the Autism Society of America (ASA). These organization may have chapters in your area. If not, they can provide you with the names of professionals who would know someone to refer you to, in your geographical area.
- if you know parents of children with autism, ask them about the professionals in your area familiar with autism. If those professionals cannot help you, they will refer you to someone in your area familiar with AS in adults.
To find out what some adults have to say about growing up with AS, read Autism Life Skills.
Temple Grandin: The HBO Movie starring Claire Danes
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Temple Grandin, a world-renown designer of livestock handling facilities and a professor of animal science at Colorado State University, is arguably the world’s most famous person with autism. Temple has written many books about autism, others about animals, and even more about both. Last week I called Temple (who wrote the forward to my first three books) to get her input on my latest book, 41 Things to Know About Autism. Temple told me that the long-awaited “Temple Grandin” directed by Mick Jackson is finally premiering on HBO on February 6. The screenplay by Christopher Monger and William Merritt Johnson is based on Temple’s book “Thinking in Pictures,” as well as “Emergence” by Temple Grandin and Margaret Sciariano.
For Emily Gerson Saines, Executive Producer, this movie has been a labor of love for nne years. A parent of a child diagnosed at three, she was given Temple’s autobiography, “Thinking in Pictures,” by her own mother. The book became a source of inspiration for her in raising her own child.
Temple is well-known for her ability of thinking in pictures, and I was therefore curious as to how she would react to seeing her life in images created by others, not necessarily the same pictures she has in her mind about her life. Temple discussed her thoughts with me about the movie.
How much input did Temple have on the making of this movie?
“I gave input into the screenwriting, spent a good amount of time, four days, with the writers and two days with the director. I think they did a great job. They built a cattle dipping vat based right on my original, off of my drawings. My drawings are all over the movie; I really liked that. In a scene near the end of the movie, I am selling a job to one of the meat plants, my drawings are out on the conference room table. Well, not my originals, I copied them at Kinko’s! They did really cool animations of the conveyor system for handling cattle at the slaughter plant from those drawings – really cool animations taken form my drawings – they really emphasized my projects. The cattle stuff was very accurate. They showed all the sexual discrimination I had to put up with in the livestock field. Women did not work in the yards back then just the office. It’s a lot better now.”
What was it like for Temple to see Claire Danes playing her?
“Weird. It was weird to see me on the screen. It was like going in a weird time machine, going back in a time machine into the 60’s. They put a wig on Claire and dressed her up in clothes and she had to wear these ugly false teeth apparatus. She looked like me, except she was shorter than me and we couldn’t do anything about that, but she sounds and moves just like me. She does accurately portray how I would act in the 60s and 70s. Claire did a great job.”
How did Temple help Claire prepare for the role?
“We met in New York for a half a day and I gave her all my tapes of me, of old lectures from the late 80’s, early 90’s and an old Larry King show I did. I only had still photos from childhood; they didn’t take video in our house then. Claire had a voice and movement coach.
Did the film attempt to portray how Temple’s mind thinks in pictures; and if so how did they do that?
“The movie is great. They really showed how my mind works. They have a neat scene where they show how I think in pictures, very effective. I love how they showed that. They showed sequentially pictures of ‘shoes’ that is exactly how I think – like snapshots of different types of shoes: high heels, flats, all different types and shapes and colors.”
What was Temple’s favorite aspect of the movie?
“The visualizations and they way they used my drawings. They showed the optical illusion I built, the science teacher challenged me to do that, the Amesʼ “Distorted Room. They built a working squeeze machine I designed and the gate at my aunt’s ranch.”
What was it life for Temple being on the movie set, watching them put her life story into pictures?
“I only watched a small part of it being filmed. I watched it through a monitor because I didn’t want to make Claire nervous. What really interested me was the number of people on the set that had Asperger’s Syndrome. Smart people. Let’s just say they weren’t sweeping the floor. They are all part timers. There are a lot of technical jobs in production and it was like a big construction project.”
What message does Temple want people to take away from seeing this movie?
“I hope one of the things they get from it is the importance of a good teacher and mentors. Mr. Carlock (David Strathairn) saw that I had some areas of strength and he developed that. He spotted my ability with science; mentors are attracted to ability. Sometimes you find the mentors in the oddest places. In fact, the first meat plant I ever went to, I got in because I met the wife of their insurance agent, because she liked my hand embroidered shirt.
People are going to hire you because of your skill not your personality. You need to have a portfolio to show them what you can do. When I first went into the American Society of Agricultural Engineers, they thought I was weird, they didn’t even want to talk to me. Then I whipped out the cow dip vat drawing and that made them respect me.
Also, it’s important for people with Asperger’s to understand they need to make things that people want in order to make a living. Like the opening gate at my aunt’s farm – I would get upset at my aunt, but I ended up building the gate my aunt (Catherine O’Hara) wanted. I figured out how to open the gate without getting out of the car. This gate – it solved other’s people’s problems. That’s something you can make money from. The gate was an early project at age 16 before I made the squeeze machine. I hope this movie inspires a lot of parents.”
What is it like for Temple to know that there is a movie of her life out there?
“Well, I’ll never get a fat head. I’ll go on the movie tour, and go on my book tours, and then I’ll come back here. I never forget what my real job is, which is my livestock stuff. Today, I’m having lunch with one of my students to discuss a project we are working on together. That’s my real job.”
A few days after talking to Temple about the movie, I was given the opportunity to see it. I have to agree with Temple. It’s a great movie and not just for people interested in autism or cattle, because It’s a wonderful, inspirational, and entertaining story. The messages that Temple hopes people will take away are true for everyone, not just those with Asperger’s, especially in this economy. As a friend of Temple’s I was impressed with Claire’s interpretation of her: she really sounds and moves like Temple. As a former production professional, I appreciated the effort and care with which they took words on a page and translated them into sounds and images that accurately portrayed a person who is a hero to many of us – not an easy thing to do. As a parent of a child with autism, I could not help but relate to Temple’s mother, Eustacia Cutler (Julia Ormond), and was moved to tears during the final scene. Watch this movie, you’ll be glad you did.
This article was first published on HuffingtonPost.com, January 13, 2010.
Posted In: Adolescents and Teenagers with Autism, Adults on the Autism Spectrum, Articles, Autism Life Skills, Employment, Huffington Post, Parents of Children with Autism, People with Asperger's Syndrome, Resources For, Siblings of a Child with Autism, Transitions
Tags: 41 Things To Know About Autism, abilities, Animal Science, asperger’s, Autism, Catherine o'Hara, Cattle, Christopher Monger, Claire Danes, Colorado State University, David Strathairn, Emily Gerson Saines, Employment, Entertainment News, Eustacia Cutler, Hbo, Hbo Movie, Julia Ormond, Livestock, Mick Jackson, Movie, Temple Grandin, Wiliam Merritt Johnson | No Comments »
Open Letter to Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger
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Dear Arnie,
I hope you don’t mind me calling you Arnie, but I feel like we have a lot in common. My family also immigrated from Europe to follow the American Dream, and a couple of years ago I had the pleasure of meeting one of your wife’s relatives — Anthony Shriver — when we were both invited to speak at the Shafallah Center for Children with Special Needs in Qatar. Also, your oldest daughter, Catherine, was born the same year as my son, Jeremy, and my daughter is a few months younger than your Aurelia. And did I forget to mention? We live in the same state. So, I feel close to you.
Arnie, I’m writing to you today in regards to a topic I know you are sick of hearing about. I promise, I’ll keep it short. It’s about the budget. I just want to know, have you forgotten the nice things about living in the old country? I’m not sure about Austira, but I know from personal experience that in France, Germany and the UK, they take care of their young, their sick, their old, and their disabled — those who are now who are suffering the most from the budget cuts here in California. By the way, I’m still trying to figure out how we got into this position; I heard that if California were a country, it would rank among the ten largest economies in the world, interesting, huh?
Speaking about budget cuts, my friends are always picking on me about the French only working 35 hours a week and how the system over there is going broke. Well, now all my friends working for the different California state departments aren’t laughing anymore — they are being forced to work as little as the French (you know, those unpaid furlough days they have to take?) — and our beautiful state is still broke. Big difference — in France — the same workers are getting health care and 5 weeks paid vacation, nice pensions, can you beat that? Weird, huh?
Granted, Europe is not perfect and it was hard to be a self-made man back then in the old days, (easier now, so I have heard). When I was over there working in TV and film, I could not get an education for my autistic son (I hear that, too, is beginning to change). But when I was pregnant with my daughter, Rebecca, the French doctors realized from the pre-natal care that they had insisted in providing me, that she was going to be born with a certain medical condition. Rebecca required shots, blood tests, medication and frequent monitoring. They gave her excellent medical care (all for free) for a year and continued to monitor her afterwards. Thanks to that preventative and early intervention, today she is healthy, and on her way to becoming a productive member of society.
My French grandmother lived in Paris till she was 96, bless her heart, and she did not have to worry about having a roof over her head and enough food to eat (what with rent control and all). Memere had health care workers visit once a day, and when she could not climb the stairs anymore she went to an old age home which was an old Victorian house — where many of her former neighbors lived. She enjoyed the last of her days without worrying about how she could afford to eat and sleep. Memere was a factory worker, and she had her pension, and medical care, too.
In comparison, my mom has Parkinson’s, she is stuck in a wheelchair and lives in a nursing home down the street from me, and believe me — you don’t want to now how much it costs. I’m not sure what we are going to do when Maman’s money runs out.
Meanwhile, I have raised my son, Jeremy, despite his severe autism as best I could, and he has become an inspirations to many in the autism community. You can see for yourself on MTV’s True Life, in “I Have Autism.” In fact, his story was picked as the one of the tops 5 most inspiring moments for overcoming challenges from a couple of hundred True Life Stories. Last fall, he passed the California High School Exit Exam, all by typing with one finger. Pretty amazing, huh?
Arnie, I love the whole self-made man and the “American Dream” that made you move here years ago in the first place — which is why I was so thrilled when the state of California started some self-employment projects for people with developmental disabilities. My son and I have been involved in a few of these projects; he is all for pulling his own weight. ‘Course now with all the budget cuts, I’m not sure what is going to happen to him and his American Dream.
Which reminds me — right now, my husband still has a job, although it is in construction project management, so who knows how long that will last. I kinda worry sometimes what will happen to our family — our nice middle class tax-paying family if the construction business completely dries up. And I’m sure we can’t be the only ones losing sleep and worrying over stuff like this.
Now, I know I am rambling here — I’m almost done — but did I tell you about my Rebecca? I’m very proud of her, too. She is going to be a senior in high school and we are going on a road trip next week to visit some University of California and State College campuses in California. I don’t have the heart to tell her it is probably a waste of time — with all the budget cuts I’m not sure she will get in (even though she is an excellent student) because they are admitting less people next year — what with the budget cuts. Even if she gets in, I’m not sure how we can afford it, seeing how Rebecca’s brother and her grandma are going to be depending upon us more and more this coming year.
Hey, I read yesterday in the Sunday New York Times that Tom Arnold says he is making a movie with you in 14 months — it’s going to start shooting the day after you leave office? He says there is no plot or script determined yet. He said, “It’s not going to be called ‘True Lies II,’ but it might as well be…” Well, that’s pretty funny, though I don’t think he meant it quite that way.
But actually I have an idea for your first movie when you leave office — it goes like this: you take a wealthy state like California, and you take away the social supports in place for the children, disabled and elderly; you force those who have government jobs to close their offices a few days a month and take a cut in pay; drive the unemployment rate up to 10%; you mix in a few natural disasters like wildfires in San Diego, Los Angeles and Santa Barbara; add an earthquake in San Francisco; and — but wait! Didn’t these things happen already? LOL — I guess it can be a reality TV show!
Actually, I think we could all use a good, funny comedy when you are back in Hollywood, don’t you, to take our mind off our troubles? Come to think of it, going to the movies is not in our budget anymore. Hope it doesn’t effect your children’s future if most Californians can’t afford movie tickets anymore, either. Actually, it probably won’t even make a dent a your finances. “Funny the way it is, if you think about it, somebody’s going hungry and someone else is eating out.” Dang! This darn Dave Matthews song keeps playing in my head! So annoying.
Now please, Arnie, don’t get the idea I’m blaming you for all this. I understand it takes more than a few years and a few people to get us into a mess like this. But, right now, you’re the top man — “the buck stops here.” Which reminds me — I read the other day in my local San Diego Union Tribune that LA City Hall paid an estimated $1.4 million on police protection and other services at Michael Jackson’s memorial, including $48,000 on sandwiches brought in for police from 70 miles away. Those must have been some sandwiches! (You know, sometimes I’ll go that extra mile for a cheeseburger from In-and-Out, but I digress). Anyhow, I’m a big fan of Michael Jackson, but where did all that money come from to pay for this?
Well got to go — need to write a letter to President Obama. Gotta let him know I can’t afford to volunteer for the community anymore. Got to spend every free moment earning money or taking care of my mom and son. By the way, I’ve spent money traveling around to advise different autism taskforces around the state these last few years — do you think I can get reimbursed for expenses? I could use the gas money now.
Please give my best to your lovely wife, Maria. I really do appreciate all that she and her family have done for the developmentally disabled — Special Olympics, Best Buddies. God knows we need these volunteer programs now more than ever.
Thanks for all you do,
Chantal
Posted In: Adults on the Autism Spectrum, Employment, Huffington Post, Transitions
Tags: Autism, budget cuts, California, developmentally disabled, Employment, medical | No Comments »
Breaking News in San Diego: The Marines are Looking for A Few Good Men
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This morning, the headline of my San Diego Union Tribune read: Case stirs military recruiting questions – Autistic man in brig, facing court-martial. I read this after helping my son – who is non-verbal and severely impacted by autism – get on his special education bus for the ride to high school. He too has been recruited by the military.
How Pvt. Joshua D. Fry was recruited – he lived in a group home and is under limited conservatorship – is beyond comprehension. However, I get enough emails from parents to know they deal with recruiters all the time. I even wrote an article about my son’s experience.
Please understand I am not anti-military (some of my closest relatives serve and I support them) or against people being enlisted who are on the spectrum and able to serve (I have friends with Asperger’s Syndrome who probably would do a fine job in the military). This story makes me wonder where the recruiters go fishing for non-autistic, supposedly neurotypical people to serve their country.
Having raised a person severely impacted by autism for 20 years, I have learned the only way to survive is to laugh at all the absurdities we parents are often subject to. So if you do not enjoy sardonic wit, I suggest you do not read the following article I wrote which was first published on www.ageofautism.com:
“The Marines are Looking for a Few Good Men” Rarely does the war in Iraq coincide with the war on autism in my house. Yet a few months ago, the phone rang and my hands were full of crap, literally. Normally, I would have let voice mail pick up, but I was expecting a call from my daughter. I ran to the phone and picked it up with the rubber gloves I was wearing. I was in the middle of cleaning my 18-year-old autistic son’s most recent failed attempt to make it to the toilet in time. Timing is everything.
“May I please speak to Jeremy?” requested a strong male voice. This is an unusual request in my house, as my son Jeremy is nonverbal. “He can’t come to the phone right now. Who is this, please?” I asked. “Take this number down, and tell him to call Ron,” the male voice instructed. “What is this about?” I inquired. “I’m from the Marines. I’m calling all the seniors from Torrey Pines High School, and I want to tell Jeremy what we have to offer.” “Really,” I replied, “Do you offer toilet training? I’ve heard you are really good at teaching bed making, standing in line and following directions. We are still having trouble in those areas, too. When can he start and where do I bring him?”
Actually, that was the conversation going on in my head. I just laughed and told him my son was autistic, nonverbal, and couldn’t talk on the phone. When you have a son as disabled as I do, you learn to be grateful for the smallest things. Like the fact that your son will never be eligible for active duty and that he doesn’t risk the possibility of getting killed in Iraq. A short time later, Jeremy received a letter from the Selective Service System, who obviously were still looking for a few good men. This letter informed Jeremy that since he was now 18, he was required by law to register for selective service. Included was an application to fill out listing three categories of possible exemptions. As I read the application, I thought “OK, I’ll just have to check one of these off for Jeremy and mail it out.” To my dismay, there were only three possible exemptions listed: “Females”; “Members of the Armed Forces on full-time active duty”; and “Men who are unable to register due to circumstances beyond their control, such as being hospitalized, institutionalized, or incarcerated.” I couldn’t believe it. My son did not fit into any of those categories. Where was I supposed to check for “Males over the age of 18 who require 24-hour care because of their disability”? Was I supposed to sign Jeremy up and send him with his own private support person if he were ever drafted? So I decided to get creative. I drew my own box at the bottom of the list, checked it off and wrote next to it “My son is severely impacted by autism and requires 24-hour care and help with all of his every day living skills. Please see attached documentation.” I thought that would be the end of it.
Lo and behold, a few months later, Jeremy received his legal proof of registration card from the Selective Service System. He also received a pamphlet extolling him to “DISCOVER THE CAREER YOU WERE BORN TO PURSUE,” and informing him that they had “MORE THAN 4,000 JOBS TO EXPLORE,” and my personal favorite “88% OF OUR JOBS TRAIN YOU FOR A CAREER OUTSIDE THE MILITARY.”
Now, as a an expert on transition to adulthood services for those on the autism spectrum, I started fantasizing here. According to the 2002 report published by the President’s Commission on Excellence in Special Education (ordered by President George Bush), unemployment rates for working-age adults with disabilities have hovered at the 70% level for at least the past twelve years. The Commission found that poor implementation of federal laws and policies in effect to help disabled students transition to competitive employment or higher education was one the reasons for such a high rate of unemployment.
Well, what if we put the Selective Service System in charge of transition programs and special education services from high school on up? They seem to be good at job development and effective at implementation of federal law and policies. I continued to read the pamphlet…. “Choosing a career is a big decision. What do you love to do? What are you good at?” Gosh, these are the same questions I ask the teens and young adults with autism in my line of work. “Join the military and find out.”
Seriously, I doubt I could ever get Jeremy to agree to join the military, even if it offered him a guaranteed career. During the 2004 presidential debate, my son sat with us in the family room, flicking a piece of string, seemingly impervious to what we were watching for two hours. Back then, my son was just learning how to use a letter-board as a means of communication and we were unsure of how much he understood of what he heard. (As shown on MTV’s True Life episode “I Have Autism,” Jeremy has recently mastered the use of a Litewriter, a piece of assistive technology that speaks out what he types). The next day in a workshop, Jeremy was asked to demonstrate his letter-board capabilities to a group of people watching on a video monitor in a separate room.
Soma Mukhopadhyay, educational director of HALO, presented a letter-board to Jeremy and said, “Hi Jeremy. Nice to see you. Do you want to tell me about something you did or something you watched on TV yesterday?”
SAW ON TV, Jeremy spelled out.
“What did you watch?” asked Soma
DEBATE
“Who do you want to see win the election, Jeremy, The democrats or the republicans?”
DEMOCRATS
“Why?”
STOP THE WAR
“What happens when we stop the war?” inquired Soma.
SOLDIERS CAN COME HOME
All this just goes to show, my son may be autistic, but he definitely isn’t stupid.
The Marines are Looking for a Few Good Men
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Rarely does the war on Iraq coincide with the war on autism in my house. Yet, a few months ago, the phone rang and my hands were full of crap, literally. Normally, I would have let voice mail pick up, but I was expecting a call from my daughter. I ran to the phone and picked it up with the rubber gloves I was wearing. I was in the middle of cleaning my 18 year old autistic son’s most recent failed attempt to make it to the toilet in time. Timing is everything.
“May I please speak to Jeremy?” requested a strong male voice. This is an unusual request in my house, as my son Jeremy is nonverbal. “He can’t come to the phone right now. Who is this, please?” I asked. “Take this number down, and tell him to call Ron,” the male voice instructed. “What is this about?,” I inquired. “I’m from the Marines. I’m calling all the Seniors from Torrey Pines High School, and I want to tell Jeremy what we have to offer.” “Really,” I replied, “Do you offer toilet training? I’ve heard you are really good at teaching bed making, standing in line and following directions. We are still having trouble in those areas, too. When can he start and where do I bring him?”
Actually, that was the conversation going on in my head. I just laughed and told him my son was autistic, nonverbal and couldn’t talk on the phone. When you have a son as disabled as I do, you learn to be grateful for the smallest things. Like the fact that your son will never be eligible for active duty, that he doesn’t risk the possibility of getting killed in Iraq.
A short time later, Jeremy received a letter from the Selective Service System, who obviously were still looking for a few good men. This letter informed Jeremy that since he was now 18, he was required by law to register for selective service. Included was an application to fill out listing three categories of possible exemptions. As I read the application, I thought “OK, I’ll just have to check one of these off for Jeremy and mail it out.” To my dismay, there were only three possible exemptions listed: Females; Members of the Armed Forces on full-time active duty; and Men who are unable to register due to circumstances beyond their control, such as being hospitalized, institutionalized, or incarcerated.
I couldn’t believe it. My son did not fit into any of those categories. Where was I supposed to check for “Males over the age of 18 who require 24 hour care because of their disability”? Was I supposed to sign Jeremy up and send him with his own private support person if he were ever drafted?
So I decided to get creative. I drew my own box at the bottom of the list, checked it off and wrote next to it “My son is severely impacted by autism and requires 24 hour care
and help with all of his every day living skills. Please see attached documentation.” I thought that would be the end of it.
Low and behold, a few months later, Jeremy received his legal proof of registration card from the Selective Service System. He also received a pamphlet extolling him to ‘DISCOVER THE CAREER YOU WERE BORN TO PURSUE,’ and informing him that they had ‘MORE THAN 4,000 JOBS TO EXPLORE,’ and my personal favorite ‘88% OF OUT JOBS TRAIN YOU FOR A CAREER OUTSIDE THE MILITARY.’
Now, as an expert on transition to adulthood services for those on the autism spectrum, I started fantasizing here. According to the 2002 report published by the President’s
Commission on Excellence in Special Education (ordered by President George Bush), unemployment rates for working-age adults with disabilities have hovered at the 70% level for at least the past twelve years. The Commission found that poor implementation of federal laws and policies in effect to help disabled students transition to competitive employment or higher education was one the reasons for such a high rate of unemployment. Well, what if we put the Selective Service System in charge of transition programs and special education services from high school on up? They seem to be good at job development and effective at implementation of federal law and policies.
I continued to read the pamphlet ‘Choosing a career is a big decision. What do you love to do? What are you good at?’ Gosh, these are the same questions I ask the teens and young adults with autism in my line of work. ‘Join the military and find out.’
Seriously, I doubt I could ever get Jeremy to agree to join the military, even if it offered him a guaranteed career. During the 2004 presidential debate, my son sat with us in the family room, flicking a piece of string, seemingly impervious to what we were watching for two hours. Back then, my son was just learning how to use a letter-board as a means of communication and we were unsure of how much he understood of what he heard. (As shown on MTV’s True Life episode “I Have Autism,” Jeremy has recently mastered the use of a Litewriter, a piece of assistive technology that speaks out what he types).
The next day in a workshop, Jeremy was asked to demonstrate his letter-board capabilities to a group of people watching on a video monitor in a separate room. Soma Mukhopadhyay, Educational Director of HALO, presented a letter-board to Jeremy and said “Hi Jeremy. Nice to see you. Do you want to tell me about something you did or something you watched on TV yesterday?”
SAW ON TV, Jeremy spelled out.
“What did you watch?” asked Soma
DEBATE
“Who do you want to see win the election, Jeremy, The democrats or the republicans?”
DEMOCRATS
“Why?”
STOP THE WAR
“What happens when we stop the war?” inquired Soma.
SOLDIERS CAN COME HOME
All this just goes to show, my son may be autistic, but he definitely isn’t stupid.
Rarely does the war on Iraq coincide with the war on autism in my house. Yet, a few months ago, the phone rang and my hands were full of crap, literally. Normally, I would have let voice mail pick up, but I was expecting a call from my daughter. I ran to the phone and picked it up with the rubber gloves I was wearing. I was in the middle of cleaning my 18 year old autistic son’s most recent failed attempt to make it to the toilet in time. Timing is everything.
“May I please speak to Jeremy?” requested a strong male voice. This is an unusual request in my house, as my son Jeremy is nonverbal. “He can’t come to the phone right now. Who is this, please?” I asked. “Take this number down, and tell him to call Ron,” the male voice instructed. “What is this about?,” I inquired. “I’m from the Marines. I’m calling all the Seniors from Torrey Pines High School, and I want to tell Jeremy what we have to offer.” “Really,” I replied, “Do you offer toilet training? I’ve heard you are really good at teaching bed making, standing in line and following directions. We are still having trouble in those areas, too. When can he start and where do I bring him?”
Actually, that was the conversation going on in my head. I just laughed and told him my son was autistic, nonverbal and couldn’t talk on the phone. When you have a son as disabled as I do, you learn to be grateful for the smallest things. Like the fact that your son will never be eligible for active duty, that he doesn’t risk the possibility of getting killed in Iraq.
A short time later, Jeremy received a letter from the Selective Service System, who obviously were still looking for a few good men. This letter informed Jeremy that since he was now 18, he was required by law to register for selective service. Included was an application to fill out listing three categories of possible exemptions. As I read the application, I thought “OK, I’ll just have to check one of these off for Jeremy and mail it out.” To my dismay, there were only three possible exemptions listed: Females; Members of the Armed Forces on full-time active duty; and Men who are unable to register due to circumstances beyond their control, such as being hospitalized, institutionalized, or incarcerated.
I couldn’t believe it. My son did not fit into any of those categories. Where was I supposed to check for “Males over the age of 18 who require 24 hour care because of their disability”? Was I supposed to sign Jeremy up and send him with his own private support person if he were ever drafted?
So I decided to get creative. I drew my own box at the bottom of the list, checked it off and wrote next to it “My son is severely impacted by autism and requires 24 hour care
and help with all of his every day living skills. Please see attached documentation.” I thought that would be the end of it.
Low and behold, a few months later, Jeremy received his legal proof of registration card from the Selective Service System. He also received a pamphlet extolling him to ‘DISCOVER THE CAREER YOU WERE BORN TO PURSUE,’ and informing him that they had ‘MORE THAN 4,000 JOBS TO EXPLORE,’ and my personal favorite ‘88% OF OUT JOBS TRAIN YOU FOR A CAREER OUTSIDE THE MILITARY.’
Now, as an expert on transition to adulthood services for those on the autism spectrum, I started fantasizing here. According to the 2002 report published by the President’s
Commission on Excellence in Special Education (ordered by President George Bush), unemployment rates for working-age adults with disabilities have hovered at the 70% level for at least the past twelve years. The Commission found that poor implementation of federal laws and policies in effect to help disabled students transition to competitive employment or higher education was one the reasons for such a high rate of unemployment. Well, what if we put the Selective Service System in charge of transition programs and special education services from high school on up? They seem to be good at job development and effective at implementation of federal law and policies.
I continued to read the pamphlet ‘Choosing a career is a big decision. What do you love to do? What are you good at?’ Gosh, these are the same questions I ask the teens and young adults with autism in my line of work. ‘Join the military and find out.’
Seriously, I doubt I could ever get Jeremy to agree to join the military, even if it offered him a guaranteed career. During the 2004 presidential debate, my son sat with us in the family room, flicking a piece of string, seemingly impervious to what we were watching for two hours. Back then, my son was just learning how to use a letter-board as a means of communication and we were unsure of how much he understood of what he heard. (As shown on MTV’s True Life episode “I Have Autism,” Jeremy has recently mastered the use of a Litewriter, a piece of assistive technology that speaks out what he types).
The next day in a workshop, Jeremy was asked to demonstrate his letter-board capabilities to a group of people watching on a video monitor in a separate room. Soma Mukhopadhyay, Educational Director of HALO, presented a letter-board to Jeremy and said “Hi Jeremy. Nice to see you. Do you want to tell me about something you did or something you watched on TV yesterday?”
SAW ON TV, Jeremy spelled out.
“What did you watch?” asked Soma
DEBATE
“Who do you want to see win the election, Jeremy, The democrats or the republicans?”
DEMOCRATS
“Why?”
STOP THE WAR
“What happens when we stop the war?” inquired Soma.
SOLDIERS CAN COME HOME
All this just goes to show, my son may be autistic, but he definitely isn’t stupid.

![TroyJeremyDanLasVegasFeb2010[1] Jeremy in Las Vegas](http://www.chantalsicile-kira.com/wp/wp-content/uploads/2010/03/TroyJeremyDanLasVegasFeb20101-300x225.jpg)

